Imagine, it’s midday you are walking down the street in a busy local Town/City minding your own business & suddenly a man grabs your bum, chest, legs?! Would this really happen? The chances are extremely slim. In fact if this had happened the likely outcome would be to phone the Police. So why is it that when the sun goes down and a few drinks have been consumed, it becomes acceptable and the norm?
On a recent weekend away in Cardiff visiting friends, we went out on the Friday and Saturday nights, both of which we received some form of verbal/physical annoyance from men. Now that I have moved back home and no longer live in a big City, I had forgotten what it was like to get this kind of ‘attention’, as going out at home usually consists of bars rather than massive clubs.
My ‘favourite’ incident or not so favourite in the literal sense of the word was on the Friday night; walking towards Welsh Club ready to enjoy a fun night with friends, three guys walked towards us one proclaiming the classic ‘wheyyyyyy’; I guess this was because we were all wearing skirts and our legs were out. Screaming words such as whey at us is 1) not flattering in any sense and 2) a massive turn off, so obviously we ignored them and probably gave them unimpressed looks. Their response? ‘Oh halloweens not for a couple of weeks love!’ Right so two minutes ago you were primarily objectifying us and now you are basically trying to say we look ugly, all because a simple ‘whey’ does not result in a pull for you. How lovely.
Saturday night walking along St Marys Street heading towards the taxi rank a man decided to walk along side us; ‘Well done you have really sexy legs’ one said to me. Thank you and all but I didn’t actually wear this dress for you, someone I don’t know, to approach me on the street and proclaim this. In some sense I guess it could be a compliment, but I don’t seek compliments from strangers, or anything else for that matter. The funny thing is he then went on to tell us ALL that we had sexy legs, obviously trying his luck, what did he expect the outcome to be? Oh actually that’s a silly question.
By the Saturday night in Cardiff I really had, had enough responding to one guy who had touched my friends chest as we walked past; ‘Would you do that if it was daytime?’ Yeah I would was his response, of course I cut him short with my reply – ‘actually the answer is no you would not’. And I’m entirely right, nobody (regardless of gender) would go up to another stranger in the day time and invade their personal space in this way.
As I said before I usually don’t experience this as often anymore, and going out two nights in a Capital City does not mean that every single guy is like that, however no matter where I am whether it’s in a big city or in a small bar, there will always be those guys that think it is acceptable to just grab you as you walk past. Just maybe think next time, I didn’t ask you to do that did I, so please don’t. I certainly would not go up to a stranger and touch them inappropriately, so why is it acceptable for you, a man, to do that to me?
Just because us girls like to dress up on a Saturday night does not mean we enjoy it when strangers give us this kind of ‘attention’.